I proclaim this here and now: I do not want to fall in love until I don’t feel like I need it.
If I desperately feel a deep need to be loved, I don’t think it is the right kind of love.
If I feel the NEED for love, what am I really looking for?
Am I looking for a person to fill something within in me that I feel that I am missing, that I need?
Am I feeling insecure? Bad about myself? Like I need man validation? I’m lonely? Someone to keep me warm at night?
Well, those don’t seem like good reasons to fall in love.
I don’t want to need anyone to fill any of those needs in my life. I want to feel 100%, super awesome, happy, fulfilled, and good about myself as me.
If I am looking for someone to fulfill a need of mine, I am not ready to give them the love that they deserve, nor am I ready to receive a healthy love either.
I don’t want us to both need love, but be ready to just be love, share love, and be able to be the best love. The giving love. Not the selfish love.
I want to accept the unselfish love, let it wash over me, and let it lift my whole being up. Whole being the key word. Then I will be able to absorb it, feel it, cherish it, love the love, and send it right back out.
Well hello there. If you know anything about me, you probably know that I have a lot of hair. Like, a lot. And it’s not going anywhere anytime soon. I’m actually seeing how long it can get. From past experience in middle school, that is somewhere around my waist.
The more hair I get, the more high maintenance it becomes. The drying time alone…geesh. But one of the main problems with this heavy mane is in the shower, when my hair likes to go down the drain and clog it up. That’s no good. No one likes pooling water at their feet in the shower. No, no.
I’ve used those plastic covers for the drains before. They’ve done me well but sometimes they clog up too or get all gross and mildewy. So when DrainWig reached out to this redhead and asked if I wanted to try their hair catching drain catchers, I was totally on board.
They offer two types of drain savers (one for showers, one for tubs), but really, if you have a tub they both will work. And look how cute these are?!
Basically they are a cord that you thread down your shower drain and then suction cup the sailboat or flower to your shower. That’s it. Then you just shower as normal. Once you find that water pooling at your ankles (2-4 months later) you just pull it out, toss it in the garbage, and replace it. That’s it.
They say you can use them about 2-4 months without replacing. I am working on month three here (obviously since I was in shorts when I installed it!), and the water still slides smoothly down the drain without a clog in sight. I’m hoping with just one person using my shower it will last quite a few months!
I am definitely a super fan of these easy to use, drain saving, non-ankle pooling devices.
With Christmas coming up wouldn’t this be a fun stocking stuffer for the long-haired lady in your life? 😉 Or, you can just win the set below. Yes, even better, right?
To win one of each of the types of DrainWig products, just leave me a comment below and tell me something fun!
This contest is only open to US residents. Contest closes at midnight on Monday, November 23rd.
Almost unbeknownst to be, my goal of life for a long time was to find a spouse – or at least a man. It started in third grade with my little boy crushes that never seemed to end. There was another boy each year that consumed my thoughts and it was a goal (although I didn’t see it then) to get that boy’s attention and to get him to like me.
The endless cycle of seeing boy and wanting boy to see me.
This boy would get me excited to go to school some days and would cause me grief other days.
Yes, I was a normal boy crazy kid. But that kind of cycle didn’t end in high school. I had different approaches and each year my perspective and maturity grew (here’s hoping at least).
None of my tactics or approaches worked. No boy I ever liked, liked me back. I was 20 years old and forever boyfriend-less.
Totally made me feel like a loser sometimes. Totally made me one strong, independent chick as well.
Then BINGO BABY. I won. I found a man who eventually became my spouse. It was like I had finally won, got the big prize, and accomplished the life goal of finding someone who loved me enough to pledge forever to me.
Mission complete. Check it off the list. Society now completely understands and accepts me.
Then, uh-oh, I lost that man at age 27.
Since this had almost seemed like my life’s goal, did that just mean that I failed my goal? I failed my life? I was a failure?
Oh wait, no, there I go again, getting right back out there trying to find a man, trying to accomplish that life goal.
Until that crashed and burned in a crazy mess of a relationship, a one week rebound period of dating, and then the crash and reality of “What the heck am I doing?”
I stopped. Just stopped.
I mourned. I felt alone. I cried.
Then I regained this incredible new insight. This new view on life.
Life is not about getting a man. Whoa. What had I been doing for the past (now) 28 years? Trying to get a man to accomplish the goal of finding validity and happiness in someone loving you back.
Which is awesome. I love love. It’s the best feeling in the world.
There is so much more though. There is so much love out there that doesn’t come from a man. There is a world to explore that isn’t with the intent of your future man popping up around the corner.
There is your complete you and this incredible world out there ready for you to explore. Whether that world is actually the whole world or just the corner of it you occupy, that’s your world. It’s yours, yours, yours – no man needed.
What if we stopped looking for that man and started looking for other things? Things to better ourselves, better the world, better our corner, make us laugh, change perspective.
There’s so much else out there when you stop participating in the rat race of relationships.
I got so caught up in fitting into societal norm and finding validity in the relationship game, I closed off other parts of my life, of the world.
Cheers, to you if you already got this. Reading this back I know it’s a simple concept and even I laugh at myself a little. But it happened. It might happen again. Being loved is intoxicating and there’s nothing like it. But maybe it’s time to expand that love and see where else you can find it and other ways to give it.
Life is not about finding a man – life is about expanding all the love inside you to everyone in your life, your world and opening your arms to all the love. To finding more of yourself every day.
Sparkle. Glitter. Shine. Gold. Metallics. If you’ve been around these parts much at all, you know those are typical words in my everyday vocabulary. I can’t help it. I’m a girl with a love of all things shiny and glittery.
To me, all that glitters is good all year round, but it’s not for everyone. However, come holiday time it seems like everyone jumps on the glitter train. Welcome to the fun side of life, in all its sparkliest best.
Sometimes I like things that are full on bling (ok, most of the time) but then there are times where I appreciate a subtle sheen as well.
I thought I would round-up some of my favorite blingy things that you can use all year round but are especially appropriate this time of year as well. All these items are gathered from Kirkland’s who has a GIANT array of metallic and shiny objects on their website.
Which one if your favorite? I would definitely have them all but the one that really captures my heart is surprising even to me. That “Bonjour Ya’ll” canvas just kills it for me.
I live in the south but have staunchly refused to say ya’ll ever. I hold on to my “you guys” New England phrase. But a canvas that marries my love of living in the south with my love of traveling (and France) is a definite winner. Ok, I think I’ve talked myself into buying it. [In all seriousness, I literally typed that sentence, found out it was on sale for $9.99 and bought it. And this is coming from a non-impulse buyer. It will be here next week. #winning]
This post is not sponsored by Kirkland’s. I’m just sharing my genuine love for the things I’ve found there. Plus, they helped me with the graphic which was just super cool.
I’m coming up on my one year anniversary with my apartment! As of November 7, 2015, I would have made my nest in this sweet little apartment for one year.
Look how far we have come together.
This anniversary also got my thinking about how challenging I found it to find an apartment.
A little back story: I live in what is increasingly becoming a college town (we have 3). There are quite a lot of apartment buildings but many of them attract lots and lots of college students. That put me in competition with them mid-semester so there wasn’t a lot of turnover.
Here’s what I learned in my first time apartment hunt:
1. Set your budget.
This is the most important factor in deciding which apartments to even look at. Make a nice Excel sheet with all of your budget items and find that comfortable range of how much you can spend on rent. Do NOT overspend here; it’s not worth it. Really be honest and budget for a place that you can live comfortably in while also paying your bills and having money to save and have fun with.
2. Decide your general location.
How long do you want your commute to be? Do you want to be able to walk to places? Are you looking for something more country or more city? What side of town do you want to be in? Where do you feel safe? Those were the general questions I asked myself when determining the general area I wanted to live.
3. Talk with friends.
This is probably the best way to become aware of places to live – and be guided if they were good places or bad places. Plus, you can hear first hand stories about the rental company management. The rental company can make or break your feelings about where you live.
The place I live in now was highly recommended by friends – and I never even knew it was there! Without them, I wouldn’t have found my apartment.
I also learned of rental companies to NOT rent from and places that felt a little shady.
4. Craigslist and Apartment Finder
Yes, the power of your friends can greatly help in this process but they don’t know everything. I found a lot of great apartments via Craigslist – where both rental companies and individuals renting out their own places.
Apartment Finder was helpful, but not my favorite. It can definitely show you all the major apartment buildings around and you can sort by price and type of apartment.
5. Drive around
Oh wait…not what you thought I meant in driving around?! Yeah, you probably shouldn’t drive around like you’re a race car driver.
I found so many places by just driving around my designated area. I would literally see a place, pull in, Google it, and if I liked the pictures and prices, I would place a phone call right there and then to the rental agency. Might as well hop right on it!
6. Viewing Places
I wish I viewed this place! Gorgeous and at a beach. I thought we needed some pretty eye candy at this point.
Once you are beginning to look inside of the different apartments, my number one suggestion is to trust your gut. Your gut it what ultimately tells you if this is home or not. There were a couple of places I almost rented, but felt hesitant on. Then, I walked into my current apartment. No hesitation. A smile lit up my face. This was home. It felt right.
My number two suggestion when viewing places is to hang around in the parking lot and talk to people. Ok, ok, I know this sounds creepy but it is important to talk to the residents there. I would just say I was considering renting and ask how they liked living there, how the rental company was, was it quiet, and would even sometimes ask if the utility costs were reasonable (because sometimes places have bad insulation and all of a sudden your electric bill is crazy high and you’re stuck!).
I hope if you are looking for an apartment that you find these tips helpful! Are there any other you would add?
Rhapsody in Rooms is a home décor and lifestyle blog devoted to helping you be inspired in every inch of your home and life! From DIY projects, adventures around the world, fashion, and life advice, I explore it all here!